Life Crisis

As every male matures into adulthood at some point they will hear someone use the term ‘Mid Life Crisis’.

And as we progress into our years, not only will we continue to hear the term used with more frequency, but each of us in some way or another will come to terms with it. As for me… well let’s just say I never envisioned a time where I thought I would experience this.

I turned fifty a few years ago and it didn’t hit with any more or less significance than any other age. Although, the number it self seemed to imply some kind of bench mark. But now at fifty two I find that over the last few years my mind has been wandering more frequently and deeper into introspection. Reviewing my life, my choices… my mistakes! The review isn’t all that pretty and to be brutally honest I have made an absolute mess of things. As I look at the sum total of who and what I am and as I simultaneously turn and confront what every man must at some point in his life, his ‘Mid-Life-Crisis’. I have come to realize that society and the machine that fuels our capitalism. The very mechanism that is responsible for spreading the tale of woe and misery for anyone found wanting at the door of ‘Mid-Life-Crisis’. IT has deceived you, me, all of us. Every male that will advance down the corridors of age is marching to the beat of societies drum so he can be prepared to meet his “Mid-Life Crisis”… AND IT LIES!

Now I find myself sitting on the door step of “Mid-Life-Crisis”. And it isn’t a mid life crisis at all, it is a total and complete crisis.

IT, opened IT’S door but I couldn’t go through. Because IT, was not what the machine taught me to believe. It taught you, me and all of us to reach the door of mid-life so you can look back upon all that you have amassed. All the things you did because you weren’t going down with a bucket list. You were not going to be the guy standing here at IT’S door and say; If only I…” NO, not you, YOU DID IT! I know I did. I was confident that as I approached this mid life door my ducks were in a row. Sure there were more than a few things I can’t do but that any of us would love to do money permitting. And for a time I had the money, all the money I could spend. But it meant nothing. If it really had any value, I would pursue it again. But I had reached in some way or another most if not all my goals. I was here without any thoughts of; “Oh if only I…” I went after life, and on a few occasions I caught it briefly. And I did and still do the family thing. I have a beautiful wife who loves me, three grown, to almost grown children that although each may be wayward in one way or another have a solid belief in Jesus and His sacrifice for us… as do I. And that brings us to the crux of the matter. Because, not only do I have a solid belief in Jesus, I love Him! I want to give all that I am and have to Him! I have wanted that for the last thirty years. But I also had my niche to carve out. MY niche! After all I had to look and be the part. I had to reach my mid life with my salvation in hand my Christian family by my side and a career I could be proud of as I begin to pass gracefully into old age.

DO YOU SEE THE LIE? I sit here looking back at what the world says is a successful life. Sure, I have my share of mistakes. But it looks a lot like it is supposed to. It looks just like I tried to make it look. And as I summarize all that I have reviewed over my fifty two years of life. I can not think of a single thing that I can present to God and proudly say; “I tried my best… for YOU”. Oh, I tried my best, but it was for me and for what I wanted. I really have no idea what God may have wanted. I was to busy preparing for mid life.

If I had listened in the beginning it wouldn’t be this way. If I had understood; “Be in the world, not of the world”. If I had; “Sought Him first” or “Hated my life and this world, picked up my cross and followed Him”, it wouldn’t look like this. I thought I was doing all those things. But after Thirty years where is the evidence? And as I reflect back I wonder how or why I thought that I was pursuing God, when in reality I was pursuing my own agenda and bringing God along for the ride. The answer for me began at the most miraculous moment in my life, my conversion. As I think back I realize that from the moment of my salvation all the way up until this point, everything I have done has been to pursue MY life with God walking beside me. Allowing Him to glorify Him self inside of MY life and my agenda. WOW! Did I miss the boat!

It’s not that I haven’t tried to live a Godly life, I have. And it is not as though I haven’t lived as a Christian, I have! But at twenty one years of age I knew what I was being redeemed from. And I thought I knew what it meant to Love God, and to serve Him alone as my King. To pin my ear to His eternal door post and live the remainder of eternity as His servant. But I got confused as to when all that was all supposed to begin. I began to walk the walk and talk the talk. I was relishing my new relationship with God and enjoying all the ways He was blessing and redeeming MY life. It has been an awesome, but pain filled walk for over thirty years. But now here I sit on the door step of Mid Life, looking back at all that I have accomplished. And every last bit of it is an example of what ‘I’ had wanted to do while expecting God to keep in step with me along the way. And now I realize that somewhere in my past I made a turn and God didn’t and I just kept right on walking. Walking so far away that now I can’t even see Him anymore! He is still all around me and still moves in awesome ways. After all He is still God. But all that I am, all that I created is the sum total of what “I” have wanted to become. And now I sit here staring ‘Mid-Life-Crisis” in the face and I realize that I have nothing to offer the God I say that I love and serve! Nothing that’s any better or any different than any other man that walks this planet. I sit atop the pile of garbage that I have amassed and survey the empty wasteland that I have created. My mistakes (although different) are just as devastating as the ones I made before I gave my life to God. And all I am at 52 years of age is a little cleaner version of the filthy man God redeemed thirty years ago.

That is my Life Crisis! For thirty years I have marched to the drum beat of this world and tried to make God a part of it. Never realizing that there was another path, Gods path, the path He expected me to take after He bought me. God’s path may have even been the same path as the one I took. But I asked God to follow me on my journey instead of me following Him on His. And fifty two years later all I have to show for it is what belongs to this world. I have yet to build anything of substance for the next.

I pray He will redeem my time left here on this planet again and allow me a chance to do something wonderful for Him before I am kneeling at His feet. But more importantly, for “YOU” I pray that you understand what Jesus meant with all those crazy, totally committed statements about what it would take… what it would mean to give up your life for His.

I always viewed my life, my Christian walk as a shared thing with Him. He has his part & I had mine. He got his ten percent, I got to spend the ninety…

I was so wrong.

It is all His. Every breath I take. And all I want to do with what I have left is spend it for Him. What ever that means! No agenda, no purpose but His. To pursue the thought of walking so close with Him while I am still here, that it won’t feel any different when I walk the streets with Him there.

I Love Him more now than ever before, and regret so much the time I have wasted.

Eternity does not begin upon our end here on earth. It began for each of us the day we were born. And what eternity will look like for all of us when we can finally see it, is dependent upon where your heart lives while you are here. 

Please don’t follow the world’s path into your mid life crisis… but exchange it for His while you are still here. Learn to walk hand in hand with the one who bought you while you still breathe this air.

His only agenda is to know and love you and be known and loved by you.  

God Bless!

The Ride

Imagine your driving in an old convertible car. The top and windows are rolled down and there is a trail of dust the car is kicking up behind you going back as far as you can see into the distance. Much like the scene from Thelma and Louise! They are driving down the dirt road heading for the edge of the cliff, only it’s you driving and everyone you love is in the car with you. The accelerator is stuck wide open and the steering wheel is locked into position. You are numb from the fear of the impending disaster and even though everything is happening at tremendous speed, it all seems to happen in slow motion. It’s as though years have passed while with each second you watch the car consume the road in front of you drawing you ever closer.

As you look through the windshield, instead of seeing a big expanse of mountains and sky you see a wall of blackness where the cliff should be… and nothing beyond it. You watch as the road passes by your open window. The wind blows in your hair and cascades across your face, drying the tears that stream from your eyes. It all seems so surreal! In slow motion you watch as the wall of blackness approaches. You sit motionless as the hood of the car disappears into the blackness. Inch by inch the blackness creeps up the hood closer to the windshield. You watch as the road blurs by your open window, expecting to see the edge of the cliff and waiting to feel the front of the car begin to plummet into the blackness. Your wife and children stare at you in disbelief as you bow your head to the steering wheel in utter failure, unable to prevent any of what is happening…

But nothing happens.

For every inch the car moves forward the blackness recedes an inch. And despite the dizzying speed, the edge of darkness remains just inches from the windshield. You sit powerless to change anything and completely at the mercy of who ever or whatever pilots the vehicle. Your wife and children, time, space, EVERYTHING seems frozen in that moment. But nothing is frozen at all. The car is careening wildly as it rolls over rocks and gullies. You watch as debris kicked up by the front tires fly’s into the air and passes under the car behind you. The image of what lies in front of you… your next year, your tomorrow… your next moment, can only be viewed as it passes by you. Only the one driving the car knows where you are headed and when the trip will end.

If this whole experience were a carnival ride, you would be experiencing the complete thrill and exhilaration the maker of the ride intended you to have, because you placed your faith and trust that what he has built will bring you safely to the conclusion of the ride.

So how is it for you?

Getting Re-Elected

How do you think he got elected in the first place?

Check List Christianity

This is a transcript of a lesson that was shared at our last meeting of our mens group EnFuego.

What I am going to say here tonight is going to produce one of three responses in you. And if it doesn’t then I will consider this lesson a failure. After tonight you will either:

1. Cheer and applaud what is said and move forward with us.
2. Realize that there is much you have been missing and leave here a changed man.
3. Or become angry and offended at what is being asked of you.

If you fall in the latter camp of those who respond I want you to realize that it is not me that you are becoming angry at, rather it is yourself and your own misguided interpretation of what it is the scriptures are calling you to do and your offense at what Jesus is demanding of you… if you want to be considered one of His followers.

I want to start out by apologizing at the way we are going to jump around in the bible. If you want to try and follow along I will be giving each passage as we come to it, but for those who are interested I can email you a transcript of this lesson which will contain each of the passages so you can review them later.

Let start out with defining some basic terminology that we throw around in the church!

When I say someone is a Christian what comes to your mind about that person?

Now when I call that same person a disciple how do you think differently about that individual?

Let’s begin our treatise tonight with the understanding that the terms Christian and disciple are synonymous with each other, what I mean is that they are both one and the same thing. Somewhere in the History of the modern Church the definitions have begun to take on meanings that imply different or deeper levels of Christian service, but be very clear that in the mind of Jesus they mean one and the same thing.

So if a Christian is a disciple, then what is a disciple?

Webster defines it as: someone who believes and helps to spread the doctrine of another.

In Webster’s definition you can begin to see why the church has begun to imply different meanings for the two terms… we have many in the church today that ‘believe’ but very, very few who do the work of spreading the doctrine… and this is where I want to begin and end tonight.

I want to begin by illustrating a passage out of revelation.

Revelation 2:4-5
Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lamp stand from its place.

He is saying “Return to your first Love”. But how does what it says come off of the pages of revelation and begin to be a part of your life?

Returning to your “First Love” by definition implies first that you used to be in love… but what does being in love with Jesus mean?

I want to see a show of hands of the men in this room who have been in love with a woman at some point in their life…

What did that love mean and how did it impact your life? Didn’t you find yourself day dreaming about her and thinking of the times when you would be together? Didn’t you want to call here every free moment and spend as much time as possible with her? When you had time to think didn’t you find yourself dreaming about her? You still went to work every day, you came home ate and slept, went to the grocery store and all the other normal things that surrounded your life… your basic routine didn’t really change dramatically but still everything changed didn’t it? Nothing changed… but yet EVERYTHING CHANGED… you told all your friends and family about this great girl you met and you spent hours planning the time that you would spend together and the future you hoped to one day share… your whole life began to revolve around this girl that you fell in love with. That is what this passage in Revelation is describing.

That’s what Jesus wants from you… those same feelings of devotion that you gave to your first love… that is the part of your life that He wants for Himself. For you to be wholly His! Becoming one of His eternal children is the free gift that He offers to you… you don’t really pay anything for it, yet you pay EVERYTHING FOR IT! It is a FREE, but it will cost you everything to accept it! Becoming a Christian is much like falling for your first love, nothing changes, but yet EVERYTHING CHANGES…

I was redeemed from a horrible past that some of you know about… and when I realized that Jesus still Loved and wanted me (ME… the horrible and ugly piece of sewer garbage that I was… He still loved and wanted me) it broke me… His acceptance and Love for me literally brought me to my knees crying out (balling my eyes out) in Love and adoration for Him. And since that day my life has been one continual conversation with Him. Some of it is still on my knees and some of it is while I am driving down the road in my car. It is a continual discussion that includes Him in every aspect of my life. It is like I made a phone call to Him 25 years ago and I never hung up the phone.

I want to interject something here and ask you to make an introspection of your own life...

If Jesus doesn’t already hold a place of devotion in your life like what I have described or you can not think of a time in your life when Jesus meant something like this to you … Then I would suggest to you that He is not sitting in the place of King or Lord in your life, and you just may be believing in a historical Jesus. You have not yet taken a hold of the salvation that He offers you… YOU ARE NOT YET ONE OF HIS DISCIPLES.

But, before we throw our lives up on the proverbial scales lets take a second look at the definition of ‘disciple’ from the perspective of Jesus.

What does the bible say it means to become a disciple of Jesus?

Jesus tells a story in Matthew of a rich young ruler that chased him down and told Jesus he wanted to follow Him. Here is what Jesus said.

Matthew 19:21-22 …sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me." When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

And this is how Jesus called the first twelve of His disciples.

Luke 5:10-11
Then Jesus said to Simon, "Don't be afraid; from now on you will catch men." So they pulled their boats up on shore, left everything and followed him.

Luke 5:27
After this, Jesus went out and saw a tax collector by the name of Levi sitting at his tax booth. "Follow me," Jesus said to him, and Levi got up, left everything and followed him.

God does not have time for you to wait and make up your mind. In fact he demands immediate surrender. If I offered to give you a brand new Ferrari or maybe an F-450 King Ranch Dually Diesel in exchange for the car or truck your driving you wouldn’t have to think about it… or if you did it was because you didn’t believe me… so which is it with God? Why are you still holding on to your life and living for your own agenda? Maybe it is because you don’t believe Him?

In Luke Jesus meets some people with some pretty compelling reasons for delaying following Him, but listen to His response.

Luke 9:57-6
As they were walking along the road, a man said to him, "I will follow you wherever you go." Jesus replied, "Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head."
He said to another man, "Follow me."
But the man replied, "Lord, first let me go and bury my father." Jesus said to him, "Let the dead bury their own dead, but you go and proclaim the kingdom of God." Still another said, "I will follow you, Lord; but first let me go back and say good-by to my family." Jesus replied, "No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God."

"No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God." He did not even give the man time to say good bye to his family.

PRETTY STRONG STUFF!!!

One of my favorite verses describing our service to Him is:

2 Timothy 2:4
No soldier in active service entangles himself in the affairs of everyday life, so that he may please the one who enlisted him as a soldier.

Peter made this statement to Jesus in Matthew!

Matthew 19:27
Peter answered him, "We have left everything to follow you!

And look at Paul’s life! He was a Pharisee and a member of the Sanhedrin, he was a wealthy member of Israel’s ruling class and after his conversion he completely walked away from his old life and began a life of complete service to Jesus.

Jesus said this to the public in general about becoming His disciple:

Luke 14:25-27
Large crowds were traveling with Jesus, and turning to them he said: "If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple. And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple.

What does He mean by “carry your cross”… In today’s terms it means “pull your own weight”! And what does this hate your family members business mean?
Jesus is not advocating hating your family members… what He is saying is that “if the devotion you have for Him does not cause everything else that you value or love to pale in comparison” then you are not fit to be His disciple!

So, now…. How is your life as a Christian… as a disciple of Jesus stacking up? I am not telling you to go out and quit your job tomorrow, sell all your possessions and join a monastery… in fact there is a passage that says:


1 Corinthians 7:17
Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him and to which God has called him.

What God is asking is for you to do is light a fire in your life that causes you to burn for Him wherever you are at, right now… a fire that is to be shared with those around you, with the people that God has placed in your life… And then again for some of you it may mean that He is calling you to change jobs, or something else in your life. But decisions like this need to be made prayerfully and under the guidance and counsel of other Godly men. But what He is not calling you to is to just show up… Showing up at Church, Life Teams or EnFuego does not make you a disciple! That’s not what He is talking about… it is not about living in the church 24/7. Those things can teach you how to be a disciple but it in and of it self they do not make you a disciple any more than putting on shoulder pads and a helmet and sitting on the side lines at a football game makes you a football player. Joyce Meyer is fond of saying “I can sit in my garage all day long and it still won’t make me a car”!

Becoming His disciple is about discovering what it is that He is calling you to, and then doing it… along with spreading his message of salvation… Spreading the message or “evangelism” as we have called it, is the basics of what we are all called to do and it is the very first step in taking your place as His disciple… it is not something you should do… but something he has commanded us to do. It was the last commandment He gave us.

Matthew 28:19-2
Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age."

The rest of your life is to be spent in serving the body of Christ or the Church in helping to teach others how to be disciples. And He provides a dire warning to those who become or remain Historical believers in Jesus and never complete their step of Faith.

Luke 13:6-8
Then he told this parable: "A man had a fig tree, planted in his vineyard, and he went to look for fruit on it, but did not find any. So he said to the man who took care of the vineyard, 'For three years now I've been coming to look for fruit on this fig tree and haven't found any. Cut it down! Why should it use up the soil?'
" 'Sir,' the man replied, 'leave it alone for one more year, and I'll dig around it and fertilize it.

Jesus also said:

Matthew 7:19-20
Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Thus, by their fruit you will recognize them.

So what is fruit? I think Jesus used fruit to illustrate what we should produce in our lives because of the example it provides for us in nature.
In nature fruit is born to a healthy fruit tree. And the fruit that it produces then becomes nourishment for those that are around the tree. And not only does it provide others nourishment but it also has the ability to recreate itself through the seeds that are found inside of it.
So it should be in our lives… we should grow to become mature Christians that are able to nourish others, and through providing nourishment be able to reproduce ourselves in the lives of those that we touch so that those who are nourished by us are able to bear fruit of their own and nourish and reproduce themselves in others and so on. This is what Jesus expects from each of you in this room… Is there fruit that you are bearing so that anyone can look into your life and tell that you are one of His? If we sat down and looked at a typical week for you would we find any evidence of service to Jesus? I am not talking about praying, going to church, Life Teams or reading your Bible… like I said before, those things are all good and should teach and bring you to a place where you can produce fruit, but they are not fruit by themselves!

And it is not just serving for the sake of serving so you can check it off of your list. There are some that are bearing fruit… but its all for show, it’s so that they can look better to others… so they can check it off their list and show others what good Christians they are. But look at the response Jesus has for those with good intentions…

Matthew 7:22-24
Many will say to me on that day, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?' Then I will tell them plainly, 'I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!'

These guys not only believed Him but believed in Him enough that they were able to perform miracles… but they did it for their own purposes with out a surrendered heart. They were Historical believers they believed in there mind who and what He was, but not in there heart… they had no devotion to him…

I know that there are many here who are His disciples and still others who are here because they want to find out what it means to become a disciple… that’s why we began EnFuego. Not to create another Bible study, but so that we can begin to disciple men and create a foundation of men… of disciples in this church, that will go out and teach other men how to disciple other men… and to once again turn this world upside down for Jesus before God closes the book on our generation. Before He closes the book on what may very well be the last generation.

Here is how I want to wrap this whole thing up… Robert Smith made an appeal to have some of you men get involved in mentoring and helping the kids he is involved with. And some of you should… But not a single one of you did! I understand that it won’t appeal to every one here... but there are many other ways that each of us can begin bearing fruit in our lives. Every one of us who wears the label of Christian or ‘Disciple’ is called into a life of service to Jesus. I firmly believe that the church that Jesus died for is the same place that He would want you to spend at least a portion of service to Him in. If what Robert Spoke about wasn’t your cup of tea, or God has not called you there… He has still called you! Maybe it isn’t clear to you yet what He has called you to but until it does become clear you need to find somewhere to begin bearing fruit in your life.

For me I began helping making phone calls to people who visit the church to say ‘Hi’ and helping out in the children’s ministry… I never thought that that children’s ministry would be something that God would call me to… but I can tell you at this point after a year of serving there I wouldn’t change it for the world. I truly enjoy it… there may be areas that you have not considered but after trying may find a similar calling in your life.

Justin is going to put a list of suggestions together to share with us next week to give each of you an opportunity to begin bearing fruit in your life… I can tell you right now that the Church has a tremendous need in the children’s department… but, I want (God wants) each of you to prayerfully consider where it is that He is nudging you to and He (God) expects each of the men in this room to become involved somewhere in their life… in serving Jesus.

Not just showing up at church events to get your check mark!

The Despisers Touch

The heaviness of a sleepless night still clouds your mind as the morning sun rises over your shoulder. Even so, the darkness that engulfs you refuses to retreat.

You stare into the corner watching… and just like the love you once shared, the roses you bought her last week dies in silence.

The spaces between seconds becoming an eternity as its pedals drift slowly to the floor just like the black ice dripping from your heart.

The weight of desecrated years rises and falls with each ragged breath.

Gnashing teeth in the pit of your stomach remind you of the hope that died the night before, taking with it what remained of your life. The void left in its absence still fills the room.

The sickeningly sweet aroma of a rotting corpse fills the air as you hear the despiser laugh from behind the roses. He reminds you of the un-forgiveness he wrought, which still lies heavy long after she left.

You move deeper under the covers as you feel his icy finger beginning to crawl up your spine, defenseless to the despair that seeps deeper into your heart with each advance of his touch.

You long for deaths sleep, to hide from the scorn of her un-forgiving heart and escape the searing heat of love’s dying promise.

Unrelenting waves of regret begin to wash over you as you remember the dreams that now lie broken on the floor around you like so many rose petals. The despiser feeds and despair takes over, as you recount her words and the violence she masked behind them.

This world holds nothing more… tomorrows hope can only be found in the promise of His rest… or her forgiveness.

The despisers touch deepens as darkness takes over.

When we Fly

When we Fly!
James Fuller ©

Pawns of chaos rule their life.
Dark skies lay ahead,
They’ve abandoned the light.
The dreams of our fathers
have been laid to waste.
Their legacy lost,
its disgrace they embrace.

We search for tomorrow
We look to the skies
We long for you Jesus
To see the day
When we Fly.
Give us our wings Lord
So we can Fly

In perversion they’re married
God’s law is ignored,
With they’re sins they’re buried.
Two plowing and grinding
And then there is one,
consumed by the darkness,
their fate won’t be undone.

We search for tomorrow
We look to the skies
We long for you Jesus
To see the day
When we Fly.
Give us our wings Lord
So we can Fly

Baleful hands lead them astray,
blindly they follow,
lost, in their wicked ways.
Under clouds of darkness
lie rainbows of light,
a haven for those
who give Jesus their life!

We search for tomorrow
We look to the skies
We long for you Jesus
To see the day
When we Fly.
Give us our wings Lord
So we can Fly

Obama-nomics

My Dad sent me this in an email today. I thought it was a perfect picture of our government today!

Obama-nomics: It is the month of August; a resort town sits next to the shores of a lake. It is raining, and the little town looks totally deserted. It is tough times, everybody is in debt, and everybody lives on credit.

Suddenly, a rich tourist comes to town. He enters the only hotel, lays a 100 dollar bill on the reception counter, and goes to inspect the rooms upstairs in order to pick one.

The hotel proprietor takes the 100 dollar bill and runs to pay his debt to the butcher.

The Butcher takes the 100 dollar bill, and runs to pay his debt to the pig raiser.

The pig raiser takes the 100 dollar bill, and runs to pay his debt to the supplier of his feed and fuel.

The supplier of feed and fuel takes the 100 dollar bill and runs to pay his debt to the town's prostitute that in these hard times, gave her "services" on credit.

The hooker runs to the hotel, and pays off her debt with the 100 dollar bill to the hotel proprietor to pay for the rooms that she rented when she brought her clients there.

The hotel proprietor then lays the 100 dollar bill back on the counter so that the rich tourist will not suspect anything.

At that moment, the rich tourist comes down after inspecting the rooms, and takes his 100 dollar bill, after saying he did not like any of the rooms, and leaves town.

No one earned anything. However, the whole town is now without debt, and looks to the future with a lot of optimism.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how the United States Government is doing business today.

I wish I knew who to give credit to for writing this… it is classic!